Benjamin seemed slightly better today after his doctors and nurses fine tuned his pain management. He's actually on double the narcotic (Fentanyl) that he was on last night and getting a number of boluses in addition to the continuous drip. He had one really bad spell around 3:45 this morning where he needed intervention; however, the rest of the day he would have episodes, but was able to bring himself back on his own. Unfortunately, the smallest little thing like taking his temperature or blood pressure sets him off. We would see him start to stir and hold our breaths hoping he wouldn't spell.
They haven't felt the need to intubate him yet although he is working so hard to breathe. They did attempt to try and get a central line in today with no luck. The last option is to do an arterial "cut down". They'll make an incision, lift a good artery and thread the catheter directly in instead of poking through the skin. If he's stable enough, he'll most likely have to be intubated and go to the OR for that. Ryan and I know it has to be done, but we were really hoping they would give our baby a break.
Four days ago we were cuddling with him and now we can't even touch him. It breaks our hearts.
It breaks my heart to see you and Ryan and Benjamin hurting like this. I know it's easy to say, but hang in there sweetie, and take each moment at a time. Love you.
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